VS will do some of that for you. It will automatically check out files as you edit them but check in is always manual. That's a design choice. When you are sending something back into the shared space, you should do so when you know it is ready to go and safe to integrate. The systems are intentionally not passive.

VSTF offers the idea of "shevling" where you can put a change on the server but it doesn't change the One True Version. This allows you to share experimental things or try out someone elses fixes with out breaking the central server.

VSTF, Source Safe, and Subversion are all source control systems. Subversion is free (I think), Source Safe is included with most VS versions but VSTF costs money. It's got more features but maybe not things you need (issue tracking, graphs, server builds, etc.).