what do you think | The Coffeehouse

Since you guys like to read Memos to Employees from Managment, here is one i just sent out...

To All Employees:

Over the past 2 days I witnessed many things that disturb me.

1.   Employees not at their workstation.
2.   Employees spending to much time talking
3.   Employees intentional spending far to long doing one job than what is required
4.   Using cell phones in the building, and using phones during work hours. Going into the parking lot making phone calls.
5.   Taking Smoke breaks and finding the nearest chair to sit down.
6.   Taking 10 minutes to get back to your workstation after break time.
7.   Refusing to do jobs claiming that is not what you where hired to do.
8.   Not using headphones to listen to music.
9.   Not clocking out when leaving company property.
10.   Dumping trash and food remnants in the yard.

The above 10 problems will stop immediately. You will be at your workstation working not talking. The job you are assigned will be done in an efficient, quality and timely manner. Cell phones will remain in your car not on your person. Smoking at your workstation is acceptable but stopping work to smoke is not.

Break time is from 9:00 am to 9:15 am and 3:00 pm to 3:15 pm lunch is from 12:00 pm to 12:30 pm employees are to return to your workstations promptly after break and lunch time not when someone chooses to.

Refusing to do other jobs is totally unacceptable. Employees at Company are not hired for a specific job but to do any job required to ship product to a customer. Because without shipping product to a customer on time means Company will loose business and eat shipping cost.

You have been given two copies of this letter one is to be returned to the Foremen on Thursday Signed and Dated. Failure to return this signed and dated will mean a 1-day suspension

This is the Last Warning.

ZZZZZ

Red5

Sounds like you have a lot of people abusing the system. Unfortunately I would have to agree with giving a memo like this when things get out of control and the hand that feeds gets biten by those eating.

Dr Herbie

I hope to god this is a spoof (apart from anything else there are several spelling/grammar mistakes).

If my employer spoke to me like that, I'd quit on the spot. If you want that sort of behaviour, you need robots, not human beings.

Herbie

phreaks

zzzzz wrote:

Since you guys like to read Memos to Employees from Managment, here is one i just sent out...

To All Employees:

Over the past 2 days I witnessed many things that disturb me.
1.   Employees not at their workstation.
       Ok, so no team meetings, team code reviews, or design   discussions.
2.   Employees spending to much time talking
       How exactly does a team operate efficiently as a team without talking?
3.   Employees intentional spending far to long doing one job than what is required
      How much time was allocated in the Project Plan for these tasks? Iteration backlogs may make accountability easier for everyone.
4.   Using cell phones in the building, and using phones during work hours. Going into the parking lot making phone calls.
       I am assuming that employees are not issued company cell phones then.
         Policy is a bit harsh, if someone has an emergency they should be able to be contacted.
5.   Taking Smoke breaks and finding the nearest chair to sit down.
6.   Taking 10 minutes to get back to your workstation after break time.
7.   Refusing to do jobs claiming that is not what you where hired to do.
8.   Not using headphones to listen to music.
9.   Not clocking out when leaving company property.
10.   Dumping trash and food remnants in the yard.

The above 10 problems will stop immediately. You will be at your workstation working not talking. The job you are assigned will be done in an efficient, quality and timely manner. Cell phones will remain in your car not on your person. Smoking at your workstation is acceptable but stopping work to smoke is not.

Now you're talking. I wish someone would let me puff at my desk.

Break time is from 9:00 am to 9:15 am and 3:00 pm to 3:15 pm lunch is from 12:00 pm to 12:30 pm employees are to return to your workstations promptly after break and lunch time not when someone chooses to.

Refusing to do other jobs is totally unacceptable. Employees at Company are not hired for a specific job but to do any job required to ship product to a customer. Because without shipping product to a customer on time means Company will loose business and eat shipping cost.

You have been given two copies of this letter one is to be returned to the Foremen on Thursday Signed and Dated. Failure to return this signed and dated will mean a 1-day suspension

This is the Last Warning.

ZZZZZ

My replies in purple. Seems like there is alot of structure over there/ I guess that could be a good thing or a bad thing. I personally think that too much structure inhibits design and team interoperability and efffects the overall quality of the product, but that's just my take on it.

Some of the issues like dumping trash and being MIA are valid, some of the others I think will ultimately effect your team morale and ability to effectively communicate.

Using fear to motivate employees seldom works out the way it was intended. It really seems to me like you need to think about what the cause of these issues are. Do developers need more time to discuss project needs, etc.

just my 2 cents.

Manip

I assume the company will be liable if the cell phones are stolen out of people's cars in the yard?

I would personally "fix" this problem by adding a new layer of management that have a set team and a set deadline. That way it will be in the management's best interest to motivate their employees and to complain about any that aren't performing.

As opposed to some manager (you) who just wonders around the building, has no idea what's going on and complains about random occurrences they spot.

dahat

You’ll please forgive me but that memo seems a little reminiscent of this one.

In both cases they are well intentioned... I just suspect that they would/will have a detrimental impact on morale.

Angus

Nice idea, employees should behave how management wants, or they should find a new job.

Angus Higgins

Ian2006

zzzzz wrote:

Since you guys like to read Memos to Employees from Managment, here is one i just sent out...

To All Employees:

Over the past 2 days I witnessed many things that disturb me.

1.   Employees not at their workstation.
2.   Employees spending to much time talking
3.   Employees intentional spending far to long doing one job than what is required
4.   Using cell phones in the building, and using phones during work hours. Going into the parking lot making phone calls.
5.   Taking Smoke breaks and finding the nearest chair to sit down.
6.   Taking 10 minutes to get back to your workstation after break time.
7.   Refusing to do jobs claiming that is not what you where hired to do.
8.   Not using headphones to listen to music.
9.   Not clocking out when leaving company property.
10.   Dumping trash and food remnants in the yard.

etc., etc., etc....

I don't want to sound rude to you.

What you have there is, what I call, an organisational and management problem encompassing an inferiority complex,
that got (not out of nowhere) noticed by your employees.

You will have to work on your behaviour at first before
hitting the road of big business. Diplomacy is what you
lack at the first sight when reading your concerns.

My suggestion to you would be, that you exchange your
management role to something more suitable to you.

regards

ps. I'm not an employee of your organisation

Simo

Jeezus. What are these people doing? Building iPods?

DoomBringer

Some I agree with, some I don't.

Smoking at your desk is a really bad idea. Computers don't like cig smoke at all.
Listening to music with headphones, thats just common courtesy.

Too much talking/not at workstations... well, tough. As noted before, you need design meetings or whatever. Heck, if I'm a dev, and a QA person wants to show me an issue, I have to go there. And as long as the work gets done, I don't care too much what people do (within the normal limits of course).

jmsma2005

One shortcut to be a good manager is to get married and have at least 2 children. Big Smile

phreaks

DoomBringer wrote:

Some I agree with, some I don't.

Smoking at your desk is a really bad idea. Computers don't like cig smoke at all.

I didn't realize that there were still places on earth where this was even legal. *Ponders moving*

zzzzz

First i'm a Small Manufacturing Company not a programing company, which i have stated many times.

And i find your comments very funny and what i would expect out of people under 35 your work ethic is a nonexistent .

These problems do not come from the top. i'm out in manufacturing doing work getting machines running and trying to improve productively.

We are not a smoke free environment and will not become one, this includes the office.

These problems are coming out of the new employees not the ones who have been here 30 years. The Morale of the old people Jumped up allot because they were getting very annoyed with the new people not working.

The old foreman who was moved sideways recently will be retiring after 45 years of service. So my family has been doing something right for 56 years.

I am not responsible for items stolen out of your car.
Someone can call the office in the case of an emergency and you will be directed to a phone.

We supply multi-billion dollar companies Boeing, Tyco, Intel, AMD, UL, GE, GM, Ford, pretty much pick a fortune 500 company and we sell to them. These companies have no problem sending lawyers to your door if their production line is shutdown.

I'm glad some of you would quit because i would not have to pay unemployment.

Last Night after Handing this letter out 5 old employees and Myself stay late building product We accomplished more in 2 hours than 6 people did in a day. The only reason i did not fire the entire lot of new employees on Monday was because my production is so backlogged and is behind 2 weeks because of the new employees.

borosen

Since you are a small company, why not talk directly to the people not doing their job instead of alienating your self through a memo?

AdamKinney

Off topic, but since you're asking...I think subject lines should describe the thread.

zzzzz

borosen wrote:

Since you are a small company, why not talk directly to the people not doing their job instead of alienating your self through a memo?

Take note of the last line in the memo THIS IS THE LAST WARNING

I don't have much hope with this lot turning them into productive employees.

As my father said been here done this ZZZZZ deal with it..

Red5

zzzzz wrote:

And i find your comments very funny and what i would expect out of people under 35 your work ethic is a nonexistent .

I would tend to agree with this statement, especially in regards to any task that involves physical labor. Today's younger generation has been coddled by technology a little too much, coupled with too many leisure time activities. I speak only from my own experience in hiring people to help build my house and the various labor jobs I have been exposed to (and worked on) in the last 20 years.

So what is it about Channel9 that you find worthwhile? Do you actually do any programming in your daily work?

maniac78

You should have just performance dropped the really bad performers.

zzzzz

Red5 wrote:

I would tend to agree with this statement, especially in regards to any task that involves physical labor. Today's younger generation has been coddled by technology a little too much, coupled with too many leisure time activities. I speak only from my own experience in hiring people to help build my house and the various labor jobs I have been exposed to (and worked on) in the last 20 years.

So what is it about Channel9 that you find worthwhile? Do you actually do any programming in your daily work?

I'm the IT department/General Manager or VP if you wish. My years in college was going for a degree in Computer Tech

Plus i'm working on automation project which involves Lab and CNC equipment So yes i do program.

My job is my life.

Ian2006

I don't understand what all of this has got something to do with coding...
Do your employees have to lift signed integers that weigh above the allowed value? If so, I would complain as well, and demand sbytes instead.

...anyways, I hope it turns out well for your business.

DoomBringer

zzzzz wrote:

First i'm a Small Manufacturing Company not a programing company, which i have stated many times.

My mistake.

zzzzz wrote:

And i find your comments very funny and what i would expect out of people under 35 your work ethic is a nonexistent .

Interesting that you generalize about the people here. I'd like to say that people over 35 are rigid in their thoughts and cannot learn anything</sarcasm>

zzzzz

DoomBringer wrote:

Interesting that you generalize about the people here. I'd like to say that people over 35 are rigid in their thoughts and cannot learn anything</sarcasm>

Well all i can say is people under that age don't show up on time, don't want to work when they are here, talk all the time and their quailty sucks.

Believe me i have hired and they fired themselves allot over the last 4 years. Anybody over that age i don't have these problems. So its a generational thing. I would rather hire some 50 or 60 year old guy or gal than a 20 year old .

BTW i'm a 27 year old

I did not write this letter because of what i have seen over the past 2 days. you should see these people time cards almost none of the new hires have over 40 hours in 6 day period. Our normal working hours is Monday - Thursday, Firday and Saturday are for overtime...

Manip

Delete this please