Coffeehouse Thread

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Thinking of ending it all.

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  • User profile image
    scobleizer

    Dude: I've been in dark places too.

    Three years ago I was in a car wreck, got a divorce, had to lay myself off, and my grandma died, all in the space of five months.

    That was three years ago.

    What would have happened if I had ended it all back then? Would channel 9 have happened? Would I have gotten remarried? Would I have gotten this awesome job at Microsoft?

    Here's how I did it: inch-by-inch. At my darkest day back in February 2002 (my layoff anniversary is Monday, by the way) I just told myself "I'm going to do something every day to make tomorrow a little better than today. Today a little better than yesterday.

    It's the trendline that matters.

    Hell, if you're broke, what else do you have to lose? Go sit on the beach or in a park. Enjoy the sunset. Laugh at us working suckers.

    But, start something. Something small. Work on a book. Take a picture. Make a picture. Smell the flowers.

    If you need to talk, I'll be on Skype later. Or you know my cell phone (It's on the home page of my blog).

    Inch-by-inch. So, what you gonna do to make tomorrow better than today?

  • User profile image
    manickernel

    TooBroke.
    I a have associated you with Aloha. That you and him are one and the same. One little thing makes me wonder if I am wrong. The point Minh brought up, ç.  All I can say is that when you become a part of this community we do care about you. Your life is important.

  • User profile image
    Loadsgood

    scobleizer wrote:
    (my layoff anniversary is Monday, by the way)


    Well... um... congrats? What I'm going to do to make tommorrow better than today is pick up my mate from the airport (and with him, presents Smiley). 
    Well I guess it can't be all bad for Toobroke, since he's on a computer (or at least he was at the time he made this thread), and he's talking to friends Smiley As for him being Aloha, there's always a chance. But we never know the truth as to who's who. I could be anyone from Bill Gates (I wish) or Keskos (hell no shiver), anyone can be anyone. But I guess that's the good thing about the web, you can be whoever you want to be.


    Please don't commit suicide, commit life instead Smiley
    Loadsgood.

  • User profile image
    liftshaft

    scobleizer wrote:
    Dude: I've been in dark places too.
    Inch-by-inch. So, what you gonna do to make tomorrow better than today?


    Isn't that the new longhorn strap line?

  • User profile image
    W3bbo

    scobleizer wrote:
    Dude: I've been in dark places too.


    I'm guessing from your empathetic reply that the IP address of "Toobroke" and "Aloha" don't match up?

  • User profile image
    Rossj

    manickernel wrote:
    Minh wrote:What I want to know is how the poster made this word:

    toobroke wrote:

    ... façade ...



    Hmmm, good eye Minh. It appears to be a standard in ISC, or Indian Standard Code.


    Erm isn't ç (extended) ascii 135? It is used in lots of languages (French (as in façade), Turkish etc) and on my mac at least was just a meta key press.

  • User profile image
    scobleizer

    W3bbo: I haven't looked up anyone's IP yet. I was just showing empathy for where this poster is at and trying to paint a picture of how to dig out of the hole.

  • User profile image
    Minh

    Rossj wrote:

    Erm isn't ç (extended) ascii 135? It is used in lots of languages (French (as in façade), Turkish etc) and on my mac at least was just a meta key press.
    I don't want to sound too callus, but it's not a character you'd get if you type directly into C9 post form. If you do a view source, you'll see the style class=MsoNormal in the original post, which means that it was written with MS Word.
    Again, it could be a totally legit post, to which I mirror everybody's sentiment. But just know that it was copy & paste from Word.

  • User profile image
    eagle

    If it was real he certainly would have loged on and posted again by now.

    My guess is that he and the god guy are one in the same and he is also someone else we “know”!

  • User profile image
    Cider

    What is going on here?

    littleguru wrote:
    Is nobody out there to help one of our C9 buddies?


    Hey,

    I don't want this to sounds cold at all to the guy, and if this guy is genuine he needs to get help and there are plenty of people outside of the Internet who can help him but...

    In his post he says he needs money and just happened to put his email address in the post.  Sorry about the caps but:

    ***DO NOT EMAIL HIM AND OFFER HIM MONEY***

  • User profile image
    manickernel

    Cider wrote:
    What is going on here?

    littleguru wrote:Is nobody out there to help one of our C9 buddies?


    Hey,

    I don't want this to sounds cold at all to the guy, and if this guy is genuine he needs to get help and there are plenty of people outside of the Internet who can help him but...

    In his post he says he needs money and just happened to put his email address in the post.  Sorry about the caps but:

    ***DO NOT EMAIL HIM AND OFFER HIM MONEY***


    Oh, that is so cold. If he will email me I will gladly send him $2000 dollars.

  • User profile image
    W3bbo

    Cider wrote:
    Sorry about the caps but:

    ***DO NOT EMAIL HIM AND OFFER HIM MONEY***


    His post didn't seem like the typical "send me money plzkthnxbye" post. If it was, I'd have dismissed it as attention seeking.

    Whilst I can symphasie and even emphasise with a lot of things he claims to be going through, I choose to remain conservative untill I see some evidence otherwise.

    Sorry for having this stance, but I'm following what Microsoft itself says: "people on the internet arn't who they say they are"

    ...And its just common sense.

  • User profile image
    Loadsgood

    eagle wrote:

    If it was real he certainly would have loged on and posted again by now.



    He might not be able to log on. It might be too late for any of us to save him if you know what I mean. Although I hope not, that's the last thing someone should wish on someone else.


    Peace on Earth, is it possible?
    Loadsgood.

  • User profile image
    Shaded

    If you were able to get a degree you're one up on me.

    Uncontrollable depression can lead you to where you have landed.  The question is do you have the courage to get it under control?

    I was fortunate enough to have severe depression happen as a teenager and was able to get mediciation for it.  I'm 30 and without medication there is no doubt in my mind I would be where you are at today or much much worse.

    Happy Friggen Birthday!  If you get me a way to contact you I'll give you a present.

    Even just an email, I can send you at least an amazon coupon for something to brighten your day.

    I'm not going to sit here and say "Have faith, believe in God" or anything like that.  Your philosophy may convince you to keep trying but I know what it is like when your mind and body have ultimately given up - there is no recourse.

    There are medications to correct this, and the stigma that people that take these medications "are not themselves" is catagorically wrong.  None of us are ourselves, without medical science our bodies wouldn't typically last past 30-40 years.  We fix our teeth, we take antibiotics and painkillers for headaches.  All of these choices effect our experience in life, and you don't miss pain when you take pain medicine.  As such you shouldn't miss depression when you take the proper depression medicine.

    I will tell you however if you are hungry, there are local church organizations that will help you keep your home and stay on your feet long enough to recover.  Most good help organizations such as this one DO NOT use them as an avenue to preach their beliefs other than through thier good deeds in assisting you.

    Sometimes you have to let go of a bit of pride and ask, which is what you've done here in the forum.

    The exciting part about hitting rock bottom is, when you find the causal connection to being there, your ascent to the surface is exillerating and fun.

    I can also give you a good refrence to a neurologist in your area.  I'm not a Dr. but I think sending you to one may help you as it did me.  A neurologist will not ask you question about your relationship with your parents.  They're not shrinks.  They're just trying to understand the chemical processes that are unbalanced in your brain, and they can help you achieve balance.

    For those people that don't have neurological problems with depression, it is hard to understand.  I like to say imagine going through life without a watch.  Its frustrating, its hard to keep a job, its hard to meet your friends, people think you don't like them because you're absent, when the truth is you just don't know what time it is.

    If it were possible some people's brain had a timeer just as accurate as a watch built in, there would be an equal stigma to trusting a machine strapped to your wrist to control your life.

    In reality, there is nothing further from the truth.

    I hate to see such suffering and I wish you the best.

  • User profile image
    Manip

    It does concern me how everyone else seems to think medication is the answer to all things ... If you take medication as a teenager maybe that means you never learnt any skills to control your mood and now if you went off them you could destroy yourself.


    I would like to say it is an American thing but it is getting a lot worse in this country as well. I myself have never taken any mood controlling medication and that isn't to say I haven't had depressive times and such, I just have learnt how to deal with it and to pick myself up.

    It is mainly about controlling your self image and not to get stuck in a loop of negativity.

  • User profile image
    Shaded

    Manip wrote:

    It does concern me how everyone else seems to think medication is the answer to all things ... If you take medication as a teenager maybe that means you never learnt any skills to control your mood and now if you went off them you could destroy yourself.

    I would like to say it is an American thing but it is getting a lot worse in this country as well. I myself have never taken any mood controlling medication and that isn't to say I haven't had depressive times and such, I just have learnt how to deal with it and to pick myself up.

    It is mainly about controlling your self image and not to get stuck in a loop of negativity.



    I never said it was the answer to all things but the similarities between his situation and mine are striking.

    I was 19 before I started taking medication, and was very near homeless at the time.  My success since then has an undeniable link to the medication I take.

    Sometimes there are no skills to be learned to control your mind just as there are no skills to be learned to control diabetes.

    It was my parents philosophy of "mind over matter" as noble as it is that almost landed me in the same boat as TooBroke here.

    I didn't send him to Mexico or Canada to go buy meds and make a recommendation as to what type.  I said I believe medication may help.  A GOOD Neurologist would do much more than ask "Are you depressed?" and write a prescription.  A GOOD Neurologist would not write a prescription if there was no reason to.

    And finally, even when taking the medication appropriately, it does not block the ability to be depressed, you just don't spend most of your day  every day avoiding it or feeling like you're being chased by a sabre tooth tiger when trying to go to sleep.

    "Depressive times" are much different than chronic depression.

  • User profile image
    W3bbo

    Manip wrote:
    I would like to say it is an American thing but it is getting a lot worse in this country as well. I myself have never taken any mood controlling medication and that isn't to say I haven't had depressive times and such, I just have learnt how to deal with it and to pick myself up.


    Isn't american TV and newspapers full of medication adverts anyway?

    I am rather appalled by the state of the US's healthcare system... insurance, medicare, expensive bills, stupid drug names (Mycoxofloppin anyone?), heck, you've even got adult diapers in all of your Walmart stores.

    Whilst the NHS is more "Socalist" and works to an extent, it does have its failings (such as the recent MRSA epidemic), and lack of NHS dentists, at least I got my proponolol prescription for free.

    Hmm, well, at least we're not as bad as France, they've got like... 5 pharmacies in every small village.

  • User profile image
    koolus

    this might be a little off topic by now but honestly suicide is ridiculous, and don't say that I don't know what I'm talking about because my dad committed suicide... the whole thing is just nonsense...  If things suck so bad then you should know that they can only get better. life sucks, suicide is a wimps way out..

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