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Windows 8 Hail Mary, Finally Hits The End Zone

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  • User profile image
    bizbazboo

    Intelligence analysts said that the announcement gave rare insight into the inner workings of North Korea's missile program, which until last year had been running on Windows 95.

    The announcement from the Korean Central News Agency (KCNA) did not indicate a new scheduled time for a missile test, saying only that it was "working with Windows 8 support to resolve the issue."

    http://www.newyorker.com/online/blogs/borowitzreport/2013/04/north-korean-missile-test-delayed-by-windows-8.html

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    The lack of ease of use, robustness, and workability turned out to be a godsend.

    Windows 8 is good for something. The trust Microsoft built up with fascist Asia leading them to upgrade coupled with the let down from the result of actually using the software may save the region from a nuclear war just yet.

    I suggest to Microsoft that they should give false support instructions when the call comes in to Redmond.

    Had they used Android, Linux, OSX or iOS, millions of people could be dead right now.

  • User profile image
    evildictait​or
  • User profile image
    Dr Herbie

    , bizbazboo wrote

    *snip*

    Had they used Android, Linux, OSX or iOS, millions of people could be dead right now.

    Oh, come on.  If they'd used Android or Linux they'd have blown themselves up by now and if they'd used Apple they'd still be arguing about whether it was swipe left or swipe right to change the colour of the missiles.

    Herbie

  • User profile image
    bizbazboo

    WPC 2013 - Sell W8 To Embargoed Nations and Crush Your Enemies

    In all seriousness, if Microsoft doesn't ban the partner that licensed North Korea, like today, I would completely destroy them in the tech press. If they have a support contract, they have some dumbass that sold them the licenses. Probably in South Korea or China.

  • User profile image
    Sven Groot

    , bizbazboo wrote

    In all seriousness, if Microsoft doesn't ban the partner that licensed North Korea, like today, I would completely destroy them in the tech press. If they have a support contract, they have some dumbass that sold them the licenses. Probably in South Korea or China.

    In all seriousness, that article was not serious. Read some of the previous posts by the same guy, he has lots of joke posts about NK.

  • User profile image
    MasterPi

    @Dr Herbie: If it were OS X, the missile would blow up, but in a beautiful way.

  • User profile image
    Ian2

    If it was OSX the missile would paint a message using it's vapour trail before it blew up:
    'just one more thing ...'

  • User profile image
    Ian2

    If it was Sony you would hear about it way, way before you ever saw it ....

  • User profile image
    JoshRoss

    If Windows 8 was a sandwich, I'm sure this guy could figure it out.

    -Josh

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